A Dream My Friend Had Once
by OKFan
Summary: These are VERY strange dreams that my friend had and some are ones I had. Warning: these are VERY strange and hopfully funny. DISCONTINUED!
1. A Dream My Friend Had Once

HI! 

This is a fanfic about a Dream my friend had once!

By the way thanks for letting me turn your dream into a short fanfic Mera!

Mera: No prob.

Well, on with the Dream!

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A Dream My Friend Had Once

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Suli, Mera, and Tiyeny were walking to there next class, when all of a sudden a black hole appears above andfour men, well, demons fall out and land right in front of them.

Suli and Mera stand there looking at the demons Naraku, Sesshomaru, and Inuyasha, while Tiyeny has already glomped Kouga and refuses to let go, Suli and Mera are trying to decide who to glomp first.

Then a bunch of girls insist on petting and rubbing Inuyasha's ears, Sesshomaru's Tail, and Kouga's tail, as for Naraku well they just stare at him.

Tiyeny hits and injures and hospitalizes any one dumb enough to touch Kouga and Suli and Mera do the same, defending Sesshomaru, Naraku, and Inuyasha.

Some how Suli ends up glomping Sesshomaru

Mera ends up glomping Inuyasha

Tiyeny ends up glomping Kouga, obviously.

And Naraku is carried off by fan girls

Minutes later..

"NO THE HORROR! NO MORE BANANAS! I'M NOT A MONKEY! DAMMIT!" can be heard.

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And so it ends.

Not a very long dream but still.

Please Review!

And Thanks again Mera!

Mera: -nods while staring at Sesshomaru and Miroku and Inuyasha pics-

Ja ne!


	2. A Dream I had Last Night

Hello. 

Ok, I had a really weird dream last night.

It was funny, but really weird!

It was about some of the Inuyasha characters, so I thought I would share it.

So, here it is.

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A Dream I had Last Night

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Kouga and Sesshomaru are sitting under some trees in the forest having a friendly chat.

A girl (Tiyeny) comes walking in to the area and sees Kouga, "Aieeeeeee! KOUGA-KUN!" she is now latched to his arm and refuses to let go.

Kouga looks confused and embarrassed.

Sesshomaru thinks this funny and starts laughing. Tiyeny, not liking to be laughed at trys to beat him up, but in seconds she hits the ground.

Another girl (Suli) walks in to the area and sees Sesshomaru, "Aieeeeeee! SESSHY-SAMA!" she is now latched to his arm and refuses to let go.

Sesshomaru looks confused and embarrassed.

Kouga thinks this is funny and laughs. Then Tiyeny latches back on to his arm.

Sesshomaru and Kouga both look confused and embarrassed and both think, "Oh, this isn't funny."

They sit for a while, and then Naraku comes running by with a girl (Mera) chasing him.

Minutes later.

Naraku can be heard saying, " No, no more bananas! I'M NOT A MONKEY!"

They sweat drop and watch as bananas fly up in to the sky and explode making bright colored fireworks in the dark evening sky.

While in the back round Mera is seen chasing Naraku.

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Well, that was my dream.

Hope you enjoyed it.

Please read some of my other stories.

And don't forget to review!

Ja ne!


	3. Yet Another Strange Dream

Hi again! 

Great news, my friend had another dream!

Thanks for sharing it to me and letting me make another chapter out of it, Mera!

Mera: it's ok. Glad to help and give ideas!

Smiles Anyway, it should be pretty humoress.

Enjoy!

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Yet Another Strange Dream

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Preschoolers were quietly playing, having fun, and just minding there own business when. A baboon came crashing though the roof.

The children looked at the baboon in awe.

The baboon looked around, trying to figure out where he was.

"Monkey!" a few of children exclaimed in excitement.

"I am not a monkey!" The baboon shouted back in frustration. "I am Naraku!"

"Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!" all the children said at once and started chasing him.

Naraku or 'Monkey' ran. One of the kids grabbed his baboon pelt and pulled on it hard. The pelt came of reveling a man with long black hair.

"See? I told you I wasn't a monkey!" Naraku yelled, obviously angry.

The children looked at him with awe filled eyes. "Man in monkey suit!" they all cried and the chasing resumed.

"This is why I never liked kids!" Naraku screamed out as he ran from the preschoolers.

Kagura, Kanna, Goshinki, and Musou show up out of nowhere (Who knows where the other spawn went...)

Musou: What did you say?

Naraku: -still running from preschoolers- "Nothing!" he answered.

Goshinki: "It figures you didn't care! You didn't even care that I died! You never even avenged my death!"

Naraku: -still running- "I don't avenge anybody! Besides, if you're dead then what are you doing here?"

Goshinki: -blinks- "Oh yeah." -goes back to after life or where ever he was before he showed up out of nowhere-

Naraku: -eye twitches- -still running- -starts laughing-

Kanna: "Dear sister I do believe that father is having another one his mental break downs."

Kagura: -nods-

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Well that's all!

Thanks again Mera! I swear you have weirdest dreams.

Mera: -shrugs- Oh well! -looks at Sesshomaru pics-

Please review!

Ja ne!


	4. A Discussion that me and my friend had o...

Hi, again! 

Sorry it's taken so long to update, but there hasn't been any interesting dreams for a while.

And because of that, instead of a dream this is something that meand Mera where talking about and I thought it was interesting and funny, so I'm making it into another chapter.

Thanks for helping Mera!

Mera: "Uh-huh, I think it should be pretty good. It would be really funny if this actually happened in the show!"

Alas, it doesn't.

Mera: "Yeah, but it would funny if it did."

But it didn't.

Mera: "I KNOW THAT! I'm saying "It would be funny IF it did."

I know.

Mera: -sighs- "you're hopeless."

AM NOT!

Mera: "whatever."

Anyway, enjoy!

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A discussion me and my friend had once

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A person, who we have no clue is, walks though the forest.

He was minding his own business when out of nowhere a tornado comes into the clearing.

"A tornado?" the man said confused. The tornado didn't move, it stayed in the same spot.

Curious, the man (ok I'm tiered of calling the nameless guy 'man' so from now on the man's name is Gorge!) picked up a rock and threw it to the center of the tornado.

"Ow!" could be heard and a man in brown fur, armor, and had long black hair, fell out of the tornado. He was supporting a red mark on his forehead where the rock had hit.

Kouga looked at Gorge bewildered, "You could see me? You aren't supposed to see me through the tornado!"

Gorge was confused.

"Ok, let me try that again. Just one more time." Kouga said, desperate to prove that no one could see him when he was in the tornado. Gorge looked at Kouga and shrugged.

Kouga then turned and was inside of the tornado again.

Gorge picked up a rock and threw it at the center of the tornado.

"Ouch!" Kouga fell from the tornado again. He rubbed his sore head. "Ok, let me try that again!" Kouga was still determined to prove himself.

Gorge sweat dropped and gave a Inuyasha like "Feh" and started to walk away.

"Awww, come on! Just one more try!"

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That's that!

Mera: Hope you enjoyed it!

R/R please!

Author/Mera: Ja ne!


	5. Saving Silverman

Hey, sorry it has been so long sense I've updated. 

I haven't had very many interesting dreams, but I'll say this one has got to be one of the strangest yet!

I suggest that if you don't know anything about the movie 'Saving Silverman' then you should look it up, cause otherwise it will a little confusing.

Hope you enjoy it!

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Saving Silverman + Inuyasha Makes one weird fanfic!

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Inuyasha walked into a house and into a kitchen. He sniffed the air and then grasped the Tetsusaiga.

Then out of nowhere J.D (the guy who's chubby and has hair about to his shoulders) came and attacked Inuyasha with a plastic sword.

Inuyahsa dodged, and slashed his claws at J.D, but barley missed.

J.D screamed in terror and started swinging the plastic sword around trying to hit Inuyasha.

Inuyasha: "Ha! You're pathetic! You can't cut though anything with a plastic sword!" Inuyasha then cut the sword in half.

J.D screamed. (Again)

Then Darren (he's Silverman, the one with short slightly curly hair) came and attacked Inuyasha with nunchakus.

Inuyasha slashed down at him the Tetsusaiga, but nothing happened. "Damn!" Inuyasha cursed and ran.

He ran into a forest where he stopped to rest and catch his breath.

He then heard crying, it sounded like Shippou. He walked over to where he heard the crying. Sure enough there was Shippou crying for some odd reason. (It is Shippou, as in fox demon Shippou, but he looks like a Squirrel/ Chipmunk/ Fox instead. Body of a squirrel, stripes on his back, like a chipmunk's, and a tail of a fox. Yeah I know weird.)

"Shippou, why are you crying? What's wrong?" Inuyasha asked concerned. (Yes I know, Inuyasha would never sound concerned for Shippou, but that was in my dream so I put it in.)

"I-I s-saw my D-d-daddy!" Shippou sobbed.

Inuyasha sighed, "But he's dead."

"I-I know that!" Shippou continued to cry.

Then there was a rustle in the bushes and Darren came running at Inuyasha.

Inuyasha ran, and was soon out of the forest and on a playground.

And then J.D came running and attacked him with a new plastic sword.

"Sankon Tetsu! (Soul Shattering Claw)" Inuyasha yelled and cut the sword and J.D in half.

Darren came running behind him, however... "Sankon Tetsu!" Inuyasha cut him in two as well.

He then ran into the house and was almost to the garage door when Wayne jumped in front of him and soon Wayne was dead, too.

Inuyasha opened the door and saved Judith (the woman J.D and Wayne kidnapped so the could save their friend Darren Silverman from marring her.)

Judith and Inuyasha then got married.

Shippou was the flower girl (Yes I know, Shippo is a boy), Kagome, Sango, and Ayame were the best mans, Rin was the ring barer, and Sesshoumaru, Miroku, and Kouga were the bridesmaids (Yes I know, every ones genders, I'm only putting what was in my dream.)

And they lived happily ever after, with a few lovers' quarrels, and much night activity.

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Yes I know, VERY weird indeed it was.

Please review and tell me how insane and weird my dreams and me are.

Thanks much!

Peace out! --Makes a peace sign--


	6. UhOk

I'm back! 

Sorry it's been so long.

I think I finally got something though

It's a dream my friend Darkfire101 / Mera had.

It's.. uh...well, just read for yourself!

It's kind of short, but oh well.

Enjoy!

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Uh... O... k...

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Mera was sitting on Jakotsu's lap and playing with his hair. When out of nowhere Renkotsu showed up and Mera immediately jumped off Jakotsu's lap and onto Renkotsu's shoulder and then started to rapidly bite/gnaw on his head as Jakotsu watched.

Then Bankotsu showed up and watched Mera gnaw on Renkotsu's head as well.

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Ok all done!

Yes it was short, but I don't control what other people's dreams are.

I can manipulate them but I can't control them, sorry. I should have another one up soon, it all depends on how lazy I am.

After all I still got home work to do, so might not write any fan fiction for a day or so.

Anyway.

Please review.

Thank you!

Ja ne


	7. Strange? YEP!

Konnichiwa! 

I have returned with a new chapter.

A very strange chapter.

And today the star of this chapter is Mera!

She came up with everything in this strange demented chapter.

Thank you, Darkfire101, for your strange demented dreams and conversations that keep the readers reviewing.

Now, on Dasher, on Dancer, on Donner, and Cupid, on Comet, on Vixen, on Prancer, and Blitzen!

(Ok, that was stupid)

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Strange? YEP!

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Mera and a few of her friends (Suli, no. Me, no. Dannor, no, but I'm going to lie and say yes for no real reason.) were sitting in class when for some odd reason that I am unsure of they got up, linked arms, and started doing the cancan while singing "Tomorrow" from the movie 'Annie'

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(Ok, in this one it was actually Mera and her friends, some ones as before. But I'm changing it a bit and adding to the made up song. If you don't know about Gandhi, then got study history or look him up it a Geography textbook.)

Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango, Miroku, Shippo, Sesshomaru, Rin, Kouga, Ginta, Hakkaku, Ayame, Naraku, Kagura, and Souta were sitting in Kagome's class room and learning about Gandhi, when they all stood up and started singing...

"Gandhi was an old man, who was shot by another man. He then collapsed and died right there, Gandhi was an old man! Gandhi was an old man, who was shot by another man. His wife caught ill and then she died, Gandhi was an old man, who died!"

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(All right this one's short, REALLY short, but I decided to put it up anyway.)

Jakotsu was making out with a tree.

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Ok, that's it for now!

Please review!

Ja ne


	8. Little Miroku People and Tarzan

HI! 

Schools over! Well, I'm happy!

Ok, today's star is Suli! Suli was the star of this dream. n.n

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Little Miroku People and Tarzan

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Suli is walking trough the forest, as she walked she saw Inuyasha.

(Note: This Inuyasha does not look like Inuyasha, He's a silver/white lion.)

Inuyasha was stalking his pray, a short 13 year old girl with strawberry blond hair that went a little past her shoulders, named Brittany.

Suli watched as the girl screamed and was devoured by Inuyasha, who ate all but her strawberry blond hair.

(I don't know about you, but I find that quite strange.)

She then left and continued to walk.

She got further into the forest when Tarzan (He's really Sesshoumaru in a loin cloth.) comes swinging on a vine and picks her up, he carries her away. As Suli and 'Tarzan' (really Sesshoumaru) swing, she can see all the little Miroku people down below.

The Miroku people look like Miroku, only some are tall, some are short, some are skinny, some are fat, and they have different styles of hair, Miroku's hair style, no hair, Mohawk, and other styles. (O.O, scary!)

Suli and 'Tarzan' (It's Sesshoumaru, S-e-s-s-h-o-u-m-a-r-u!) swing off together and are never seen again.

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I made the 'and are never seen again' part up.

Why? Because I could.

Ok, that's it for now.

Bye bye!

Review!


	9. The Bone

Ok, this is one of my dreams. 

I think it's pretty strange.

Um...I don't own Inuyasha or Kagome, but I do own Kouga!

HE'S MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE!

Kouga: I am not!

No, sighs but I wish you were.

I don't own anything that is Inuyasha related.

Anyway, read and review.

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The Bone

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Kouga is in a forest.

He can smell it, the smell, the smelly smell; the smell he can smell that's a smelly smell that smells good smell, the smell of ...a bone!

Kouga is on all fours, running around in a circle, chasing a bone that is some how floating in the air and moving.

Running and running and running and running and running and running and running and running and running.

He almost has it, just a little bit farther.

The bone stops.

Kouga is so close; he approaches it slowly, not wanting to scare it away.

He leaps in for the kill.

It moves.

He falls.

Inuyasha jumps over Kouga and tries to get the floating bone.

The bone moves.

He falls.

Inuyasha gets back up, on all fours.

Kouga is also standing again, on all fours.

Kouga growls and claws at the bone that some how keeps getting away from him.

Inuyasha is also attempting to get at it, and failing.

Kagome is up in a tree above the two canines.

She sits on a branch with a fishing pole, the string of the fishing pole is holding up a bone.

Kouga leaps for the bone again.

Inuyasha leaps for the bone again.

They both grab one end of the bone.

They pull on their own side trying to get the bone away from the other and all for themselves.

The pulling causes Kagome to lose her balance and she falls out of the tree, along with her branch, and on top of the two fighting men.

She grabs the bone from their hands and gets up.

She laughs.

"Muahahahahaha! The bone is mine! All mine! Muahahahahaha!"

Then she runs away, leaving Kouga and Inuyasha, who have forgotten about the bone and now fighting over the branch that Kagome was sitting on, to just...well, fight over the branch.

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The scary thing is that I can actually see that happening in the series.

Please Review and let me know what you think!

Ja ne!


	10. My new school, who are they again?

Ha!  
  
I finally remember a dream I had.  
  
Um...it's a bit awkward but then again, what one of these dreams so far haven't been awkward??  
  
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My new school, who are they again?  
  
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I'm in a new school, my first day.  
  
I didn't feel like going to homeroom so I skipped it.  
  
My first class was Science with Mr. Kouga Ookami.  
  
"Welcome class, I am Mr. Ookami, but you may call me Kouga if you wish." I heard him say from my seat at the end of the third row. He then asked a question and claimed that it was a science question. In all reality I don't think it was.  
  
"Who can tell me what the capital of Uranus is?"  
  
I raised my hand, he called on me.  
  
"Neptune?" I tried to sound sarcastic.  
  
"No, but you were close, it's actually Pluto!" He smiled at me and the rest of the class as they giggled and laughed. I some how think I'll get an A in this class.  
  
My next class was Math with Miss. Kagome Higurashi.  
  
"Hello class, I am Miss. Higurashi, you may call me Miss. Kagome if you want. I will do my best to teach you what you need to know for this class and have fun as well." I was once again in the last seat of the third row.  
  
After I few minutes I felt it might be easier to get an A here than in Science.  
  
"What is the square route of chopsticks?" She got a lot of confused looks. Not surprising.  
  
"Well, lets see. You dived the two by the, no that's not right. If pie Times Square is...um...if you add the one minus the two then...uh...oh never mind!! CLASS DISMISSED!!!"  
  
Yay, we get out of math early.  
  
Next was Band with Mr. Inuyasha Tutu.  
  
Tutu??? What kinda name is that!?  
  
"I am Inuyasha, say anything about my last name and you will be killed!" I think I like this guy!  
  
"This year you will be learning the proper way to smash an electric guitar on the ground, take your guitar and begin." YAY!! Destruction, I think I'm going to like this class!  
  
Next was lunch, I'm just going to skip it.  
  
Then I had English with Miss. Rin Yomigaeru. Oh goody I'm in the third row again.  
  
"Hi! Rin is pleased to meet you all!" She's our English teacher?  
  
"Rin is class English teacher!" I think she may be just a bit hyper.  
  
"Rin just had 3 cups of coffee and 2 lollypops!!" Is she even old enough to be a teacher?  
  
"Rin loves Sesshomaru-sama cause he saved Rin!" Are we even going to talk about poems of stuff like that?  
  
"Rin thinks Jaken-sama is mean!" Nope.  
  
Next up was History with Miss. Sango Taijiya.  
  
"Hello I'm Miss. Taijiya. I will be your history teacher." I was again at the end of the third row.  
  
"Here you will learn about past wars, conflicts, ......" I wasn't really paying much attention; she seemed to be the only normal one so far. This class might be a bit of a challenge.  
  
"Though I don't much about these things I will try my best teach you anyway." ...Never mind.  
  
Next was Life skills with Mr. Sesshomaru Taiyoukai and Mr. Naraku B. Monkey.  
  
I wonder what the B stands for.  
  
"Good afternoon class, I am Mr. Taiyoukai and I am the Lord of the western lands, you will bow down to me." Yeah, he's insane.  
  
"And I'm Mr. Monkey. You can all call me Mr. N. We will go over some basics to day and later on we will start on cooking, the first thing we will be making is either pancakes or waffles, there will be a vote to determine which." I don't know why, but for some strange reason I get the feeling that he's really an evil half demon, that will most likely manipulate me and everyone else, in a half-baked scheme to become more powerful. Nah, he's probably just gay or something.  
  
Next was computers with Mr. Miroku Buddha.  
  
"I am Mr. Buddha. Welcome to your first day of class." Why? Why am I always in the third row? I have nothing against the second and first row, put me there! Please.  
  
"I am sorry to report that the school will not allow me to go to or show any porn sites." He sighed, "They think I took this job to teach, so we will start with the basics and later I we will try drawing things on the computer in PowerPoint." Not sure why, but he scares me.  
  
And so concludes my first day and my new school. I may be able to pull off a few dozen A's this marking period, even so lord help me.  
  
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That's it.  
  
I don't feel it's as good as some of the past chapters, but oh well.  
  
Please r/r.  
  
Ja ne! 


	11. Tails!

Ok, I was over at a friend's house and a she said something about tails and that one word made a mental image appear.  
  
It isn't very long, but oh well.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
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Tails!  
  
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We see Kouga running around in circles on all fours chasing his tail.  
  
Next to him is Sesshomaru doing the same, in his huge doggy form of course, which looks kind of weird as he has only one arm/leg.  
  
Then in the background is Shippo shaking his head and sighing, as though he we're more mature and would never even think of doing such a thing.  
  
And Inuyasha is up in a tree scratching his ear with his foot and then falls out and to the ground, but some how still manages to keep scratching his ear the entire time.  
  
Kirara is chasing a butterfly, and Sango is sleeping, while Kagome chews on a stick and Miroku eats from a doggy dish.  
  
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Bit interesting, ne?  
  
Mera: More strange than interesting.  
  
Suli: You have problems.  
  
Thank you.  
  
Please review! ^__^ 


	12. The Real Thing No Authors Notes Just Lau...

Back, it is my B-day.  
  
Happy me!  
  
Ok got a brand new chapter for you all.  
  
Did you wanna read it?  
  
Ok!  
  
Enjoy!!n__n  
  
This is dedicated to Mera and/or Karou  
  
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The Real Thing No Authors Notes Just Laughs  
  
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Lets say that Mera is some how some way transported to the IY universe.  
  
She is wearing really bagging, black clothes.  
  
She is in a village that is currently burning to the ground and people are running are around screaming, much like a chicken with out a head.  
  
Every one dies, she is the only left standing and is confused.  
  
"Wasn't I just in my house like before the people died ago??"  
  
She then sees Jakotsu from the Shichinin-tai.  
  
Mera tries her best to fight off the urge to glomp him. (Not an easy thing to do)  
  
Lets say they let her live for the sole purpose of pouring sake.  
  
They find out she is a girl.  
  
It is night, she walks down the hallway.  
  
Bankotsu steps out into the hall, "Where are you going?" he asks.  
  
"Ummm, I was just going out side..." Mera slowly explained.  
  
"What's the knife for?"  
  
"I was uh...going to...trim the hedges!" She sputtered out.  
  
"Uh, oh...Kay."  
  
Mera looked down the hall then down the other way, "Oh yeah by the way, where is Renkotsu's room?" she asked innocently.  
  
"Down the hall and to the left, why?"  
  
"OkthankyouIloveyoubyebye!!" she ran off in a hurry.  
  
Bankotsu blinked and blinked again, he heard a loud scream coming from the bald commander's room.  
  
"A scream of pain! *Gasp* What is he doing to her!?" Bankotsu ran down to Renkotsu's room only to find not Renkotsu brutally torturing Mera but...  
  
"Eeeew..." Bankotsu cringed at the sight and Mera smiled at him and jumped out the window with last word, uh sentence........  
  
"I HATE RENKOTSU!!!"  
  
"Eeeew...um, we'll have to cover that up, yeah, any one got a ballet!? Or I suppose we could just have Kouykotsu eat him..."  
  
And they all lived happily ever after, well after Bankotsu went over to Jakotsu's room to get a different more pleasant image in his head to replace the ugly one.  
  
Then they fucked like two rabid gay once dead but now living rabbits. ^__^  
  
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That's it for now, if you have any ideas please submit a review and let me know.  
  
Thank you! 


	13. Awkward Narration

HI!!!  
  
I had another couple of dreams............  
  
FINALLY!!!  
  
Crap that was a fucking long wait!  
  
Sorry. u.u I didn't mean to take so long.........  
  
Anyway, I'm back, and I haven't died yet.  
  
This chapter isn't very long and I had to change a few things in order for it to have anything to do with Inuyasha, I basically just switched the characters.  
  
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Awkward Narration  
  
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Kagome is twirling in circles.  
  
She says, "Oh woe is me. Why must we women suffer so? The depressed woeful girl asked her self."  
  
"Suffer? What do you or any other woman have to suffer about?! It's the man who buys and does everything!"  
  
"Said the stuck up hanyou, and the woman retaliates by yelling at him, WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT DO I/WE HAVE TO SUFFER ABOUT AND BY IT'S THE MAN WHO BUYS AND DOES EVERYTHING!?! The woman then glares at the man." Kagome replied to Inuyasha's comment.  
  
"Well, it's true! And what's up with the freaky narration thing!?"  
  
"The man replied to the woman. Oh, woe is me why must this man be like all the rest? The man may buy everything when dating, but the woman must suffer through all the painful, terrible, woeful monthly times. Sigh, then there's the childbirth, oh the pain, the torment. The woman spins and twirls over and over again. Oooo, me thinks woman must stop twirling fore all the blood in her head has rushed down to her toes. The woman has stopped and now she shall pass out and go beddy-bye."  
  
And so Kagome blacks out, leaving Inuyasha the only conscious one left in the room and staring at her with a surprised/confused look.  
  
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(This one is short.)  
  
Kouga was chasing Inuyasha around with a brush.  
  
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Well, that's it for these dreams.  
  
I hope you liked them.  
  
Please review, thank you.  
  
^-^ Bye-bye for now! ^-^ 


	14. IT’S MY MAILBOX! LEAVE JEFF ALONE YOU SI...

I just had this had this really awkward thought....  
  
Well two actually.  
  
They're both Inuyasha related so I'm just going to type them up for you!n_n'  
  
Enjoy!  
  
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IT'S MY MAILBOX!!!! LEAVE JEFF ALONE YOU SICOTIC BASTARD!!!!  
  
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
  
Thought 1:  
  
Miroku has an obsession with mailboxes, Kagome's mailbox to precise.  
  
We see Miroku hugging a mailbox, snuggling it with his left cheek (Face cheek, not ass, ya perverts!)  
  
(I bet all of you Miroku fans wish that you were a mailbox......Fuck, I know I do!^-^)  
  
Some random baserbyer, well just say that it's Gorge from chapter 4, 'A Discussion That Me and My Friend Had Once'. (How he got from the feudal era to the modern will just remain a mystery.)  
  
Now, Gorge is a mailman, and he's going to place the Higurashi's mail into their mailbox.  
  
Miroku starts screaming at Gorge, "GET AWAY!! IT'S MY MAILBOX!!!! LEAVE JEFF ALONE YOU SICOTIC BASTARD!!!!" Miroku cries and sobs, "Oh, heavenly Buddha, do what you will to me but please just leave Jeff out of it!"  
  
Gorge looks at Miroku, looks to the left, looks to the right, and run like hell.  
  
+++++++++++  
  
Thought 2:  
  
Inuyasha has an obsession with tires, like the ones from a car.  
  
Inuyasha is hugging a tire and is getting strange looks; his claws pop the tire, he cries, and then starts chasing different cars in order to get the tires!  
  
(^-^ How cute!)  
  
++++++++++++  
  
Thought 3:  
  
Renkotsu is wearing a fuku like Kagome's and Ginkotsu is wearing a uniform like Hojo's.  
  
The two of them are in the ballroom from Beauty and The Beast with the Beauty and The Beast ballroom song thingy playing in the background, and they're dancing together.  
  
Then after about 5 minutes Mera rushing into the room with an ax screaming, "DIE RENKOTSU, YOU SICK SON OF A BITCH!!!!"  
  
Renkotsu starts running, but isn't quick enough and Mera axes him to death!  
  
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
  
That's all for now!  
  
Please review and let me know what you think.  
  
Ja ne! 


	15. Mafia

I just had a strange thought...  
  
Wanna hear 'bout it?  
  
No?  
  
Well to bad! That's what this chapter is!  
  
Take a look-see...  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Mafia  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Kagome is crying and yelling at her boyfriend Hojo, "How could you do this to me, Ho-kun?! I loved you! I thought we were in love and then you went and slept with that slut of a tramp! And with out me no less!! How could you, you bastard!?!" Kagome slaps Hojo.  
  
A man in a black trench coat and a black hat holding a shotgun shoots Kagome and her body falls to the ground, she is now missing a head and there's quite a nice pool of blood spread about the room.  
  
Hojo smiles a toothy smile and holds up a card, we get a close up of the card and see what it says, "Insured by the mafia, you hit us, we hit you."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
That's all for now, hope you liked it!  
  
Please review and speak your mind!  
  
Ja ne! 


	16. Everyone Wants A Tricycle!

Finally, another chapter!

This one is based off of a discussion a friend of mine and I shared.

I don't remember how it started out, but how it ended up was to funny not to post!

* * *

**Every one wants a tricycle**

* * *

It's a bright and sunny day, and everything seems normal…

That is, until a grown man tips by the screen riding on a little pink tricycle, complete with ringer and flowers.

Behind that man were two other men riding on…on…those one little boy's tricycles that I forgot the name of! They were black and made of plastic and low to the ground, with the pedals out in front…

And running along behind those two men was another man who was riding nothing, just running, and surprisingly not catching up.

The man on the pink tricycle cackled, "Ahahahaha, stupid mutt Inuyasha, you still can't catch me! Even though am on something like this." He laughed again, mocking the man in back.

The man in back of the group, Inuyasha, was noticeably angry…"Damn you Kouga!" his eyes were lit with rage as he sped towards the three other men.

Hakkaku and Ginta, the men behind the first man, Kouga, tried to pick up their speed as well, in an attempt to catch up with their fearless leader. "Huff, pant, wheeze. Kouga! Wait up!"

Just as the man in back, Inuyasha, caught up with the man in front, Kouga, all four of them went off a cliff.

Hakkaku and Ginta both screamed as they fell, "WHY MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Inuyasha screamed, "Damn you Kougaaaaaaaaaaa!"

And Kouga just laughed, "Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa!

* * *

And there you have it!

The end of the Inuyasha series!

Well, not really, but that would be an amusing way for it to go… n.n;;

Meh, well, please review for me, ok.

Ja ne!


	17. The cheating plushie!

Hey again!

This one isn't really a dream or a discussion, it was just too funny to leave out!

_ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss_

**_PLUSHIES!_**

_ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss_

Ok, now I have a large assortment or plushies.

The plushies to be mentioned are my Inuyasha plushy, my Sesshoumaru plushy, and my Blue peeps Bunny plushy.

It was a normal night, all my plushies were lined up at the end of my bed, and over the long night…I rolled…. A lot!

When I woke up in the morning, I noticed some odd things with my plushies…

**#1:** my Inuyasha was missing.

So, I went in search of Inuyasha.

I found him face flat on the floor.

**#2:** All of my plushies had fallen in way or the other.

And…

**#3:** My Sesshoumaru plushy and Blue Peeps Bunny Plushy were in a most indecent position!

My first thought…"Hehehehe…Inuyasha's got competition!"

Yes I'm not only a strong Inu/Sess supporter but I'm also VERY weird! Go me!

**Note:** a few days after that, I once again rolled a lot in my sleep and the Blue Peeps Bunny plushy was in a snuggling position with my Ein(Cowboy Bebop) plushy…

First thought: "Awww….he's cheating on Sesshy…."

**_THE END!_**

_ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss_

Until next time…

Ja ne!


	18. When Men Get Boobs: I am so weird

**A Dream My Friend Had Once**

This chapter is not a dream or a discussion, just random thoughts! n.n

**These thoughts are not meant to be offensive in anyway, I just had a random thought and the concept seemed interesting so decided to just roll with it.**

Enjoy…

--- - - - -- -- - -- - - -- ----

**When Men Get Boobs…**

--- - - - -- -- - -- - - -- ----

If the men of Inuyasha were women, what would their boobs be like?

I thought of this when a random Image of a female Miroku just popped into my crazy head and it made me laugh…here are my thoughts…

If Miroku had boobs and was a woman she would have perfect shaped Large C-small D cups with a size 36-38 waist/ribs whatever you want to call it. They would be made to fit her, figure and personality.

Inuyasha would probably be a tomboyish girl and bind her chest, feeling self conscious about her…erm…adornments. I believe Inuyasha would be smaller than Miroku and have around a large A with a 34-36 waist/rib size. Her curves wouldn't be as curvy; she'd have smaller hips.

Kouga would be smaller than Miroku, but Bigger than Inuyasha, also a tomboy, but a little more confident Kouga wouldn't use binding and would be proud to strut with her average sized B's. She'd most likely have a similar figure to Miroku 36 waist/ribs, but her curves and hips probably wouldn't match up to Miroku's and would more similar to Inuyasha's.

Sesshoumaru, our dear leader of the West would have perky C's that are or would be the envy of any woman who breast feed three children and didn't get a lift surgery. Her curves would send any man off the deep end and her waist/ribs would be a stunning 36 or possibly less. Not so much a tomboy, yet not a preppy girl either, Sesshoumaru would be a quiet stunning girl that no one had the guts to talk to, being a brain or more of a brain than many of the other IY men, as a woman she may wear glasses to try and look more intelligent and try to use her quiet nature to intimidate others.

Renkotsu would have smaller breasts. Most likely a normal sized A with a 32-34 size waist/ribs. Not too perky and not to droopy, however one breast might be a little larger than the other. He'd be a quiet girl with an evil smile. Don't get on her bad side; she has a thing for playing fire and might just light you…Renkotsu would also wear glasses, not because of her brains or to look intimidating, oh no, all the fire and brightnesswould blind anyone after awhile. Poor girl.

Jakotsu would have a firm bust and a thin waist. Her breasts would the envy of porn stars who wouldn't look that good even with surgery. She would have a nice B size with a 34 waist/ribs with curves to rival Miroku. As a woman she might be gay, but only if Bankotsu oo-aniki were a woman as well, other wise she'd be completely straight.

Bankotsu doesn't need boobs; he has Jakotsu to be the woman, but just for the fun of it. Oo-aniki would have a slender look, hips not as curved as Jakotsu. Her breasts wouldn't be as firm or perky but made up for it in size, Bankotsu would have a pleasant C cup with a 38 waist/ribs.

Naraku…Naraku would have big boobs…every evil chick needs big boobs. He'd have big hips and big breasts, sexy curves that no woman is matched for. Her looks would capture any man; too bad they'd die or become a puppet before getting to second base. He'd have DD's possibly close to E. Not so big she has to quit being evil due to back problems, but still big enough to give her back problems…her waist/ribs would be around 38-40 in size, but always hooked on the last clasp.

--- - - - -- -- - -- - - -- ---- - - - -- -- - -- - - -- ---- - - - -- -- - -- - - -- ---- - - - -- --

That's all I have for now, if there's a man you'd like to know about just let me know and I'll think about putting him/them in.

Please review! n.n

Ja ne!


	19. Baseball: Anime Style!

Hello and welcome to "A Dream My Friend Had Once"!

Last night I had this…Interesting dream…it involved Inuyasha, Sango, Kouga, Kagura, Naraku, Suikotsu, Renkotsu, Bankotsu, and Jakotsu as well as characters from other anime.

Enjoy.

I don't own Inuyasha or any other anime, this is not meant to be offensive or Mary-sue in anyway, they are only dreams and discussions, nothing more.

-------------------------------

Baseball: Anime Style!

-------------------------------

Hey there! My name is Tsukino Usagi or in the English version anime Serena Tsukino! I'm secretly known as Sailor Moon and the author has no idea why I was in her dream, she hates me! But that's beside the point. I just entered a new school and I'm going to try out for the baseball team, why? Who knows! That's just how the dream went.

Transferring with me are two of my friends, though one of them didn't even go to the same school with me before, Mizuno Ami and Hino Rei or in the English version, Amy Mizuno and Raye Hino.

We're here at tryouts and there are only two other girls, Sango and Miaka… though there is a boy who acts like a girl, his name Jakotsu. It's kind of weird, I think the boy with the long braid, Bankotsu is his boyfriend or something. Any way, the team name is Redfield Combat, no clue what that means; it has nothing to do with the school at all. School name is "Shoujo to Shounen" weird name but it wasn't my dream…

The boys here are in few words, hot. Almost as cute as my Mamoru(Darien)! The team captain is Bankotsu, the second in command is Renkotsu, he's cute, but he'd look better with hair… Our team's mascot is Inuyasha, I love his ears! The other team members are Suikotsu, the Manager, Jakotsu, the gay/girl hating weirdo, Sango, the brawn, Miaka, the cater, Noriko, more brawn, and Ryouga, more brawn and our bus driver. The newest team members are Rei, Ami, and I.

It's the day of our first big game! We're up against the school rivals, Greenfield village Killers, once again no clue; their schools name has something to do with toads. The team Captain is Naraku, second in command is Kagura, Kouga is their mascot…I love his tail! The other members are Nakago, the Manager, Shuichi, gay/obsessive weirdo, Ten'ou Haruka (Amara Ten'ou), the brawn and one of my friends, Akane the cater, Soi, more brawn, and Ranma more brawn and their personal thief.

So, the guys were practicing before the big match and forced us girls to sit on the swing set and watch…sexist jerks… they did give us some baseballs to throw around though. I picked one up, or tried to anyway, "What the…?" I pulled on it, but it wouldn't budge, "Gah! Since when are baseballs so heavy?"

'What do you mean, Usagi-chan?" Ami looked at one of the balls, looked perfectly normal to her. She picked one up, or tried to… "Oh my, you're right!" her eyes widen slightly.

Rei tried to pick one up next, "Urg! It feels like someone filled it with lead!"

Sango and Akane both easily picked them up, "I don't get it, it's not that heavy." Akane eyes the ball in her hand suspiciously and shrugged.

"My hiraikotsu is much heavier." Sango dropped the ball and all looked as a huge crater formed where it had landed.

"Heh, how surprising, that humans like you would have such strength." Kagura snuffed and stood up with Soi, as the game was about to start. We were up to hit first. Luckily they came to us, our driver, Ryouga, doesn't seem to have much of a sense of direction.

I grabbed a bat and stood at the plate, with balls that heavy there was no way anyone would be able to pick them up, aside from Akane, who wasn't pitching. The boy called Ranma was pitching…and he picked it up…wow. O.o And he threw it and it went straight through my bat…I liked that bat…

We're out on the field now, the author's dream skipped a bit. Oh well… Kouga is batting and Ryouga is pitching. Ryouga, I've noticed is strong, as is Kouga…both are a bit dense, but at least Ryouga remembered to bring a bat when he batted! Kouga seems to be just using his limbs, can he do that? He shouldn't be able to but this is anime baseball! Anything can happen! n.n

And we've skipped again, Jakotsu is up to bat and Akane is pitching now. She winds up, Jakotsu is using his sword as a bat, and she throws it. And Jakotsu gets smacked in the head…ow that had o hurt!

'Why you…Filth! How dare you!" Jakotsu yelled how would he get Bankotsu and Inuyasha with a bruised face! He unleashed the power of his mighty Jakotsutou

The snake blade whizzed by Akane who in turn screamed, "R-Ranma!"

Two boys rushed to Akane, Ranma and Ryouga! "AKANE!"

"Ryouga no, she's the enemy and you're going the wrong way!" Inuyasha glared at the fanged human boy.

After that Bankotsu and Suikotsu managed to calm Jakotsu down telling him Bankotsu would still love him even if he did have a bruised face and he could seduce Inuyasha after it healed.

Shuichi was on third, yes we switched again, and Nakago was calling to him after Soi hit and ran, Renkotsu was trying to tag Shuichi with the ball and the poor boy wasn't running fast enough, "Come on, Shuichi! You can do it, run faster!" Nakago's voice was low and deep, much like another blond…

Shuichi paused at the voice and his eyes watered, "Yu-YUKIIIIII!" He was a tornado now rivaling even Kouga's speed! He crashed into Nakago completely missing the base, "YUUUUUKIIIIIII!"

Soi hit base and talked Shuichi, "That's my NAKAGO! NA-KA-GO!"

"YUKI!"

"NAKAGO!"

"MAMORU!"

"TAMAHOME!"

"HOTOHORI!"

Soi and Shuichi glared at Noriko, Miaka, and I, "STAY OUT OF THIS!"

Miaka and I both laughed and replied, "Sorry, felt left out…" stomachs growl… "I'm hungry…" we both look at each other and smile walking off to get some cake! Noriko paying of course!

Meanwhile…

"YUKI!"

"NAKAGO!"

"YUKI!"

"NAKAGO!"

"YUKI!"

"NAKAGOOO!"

"YUUKIII!"

"NAKAGO!"

"YUKIIIIIIIII!"

Shuichi and Soi both huffed, catching their breath when another upstart arose.

"Akane!"

"INUYASHA!"

Jakotsu attached to Ranma upon hearing the voice.

"I'm over here idiot!"

"Inuyasha!"

Jakotsu then latched to the real Inuyasha as Ranma began shivering in disgust, he was hugged by a gay man…ewww.

Bankotsu was usually a nice guy…but he was getting jealous…"Jakotsu!" He tackled Jakotsu and they went to get his mind off Inuyasha…only they didn't really leave anywhere…

"Ew! GET A ROOM! I DON'T WANT TO SEE THAT!" Inuyasha glared and his mind wondered…sigh… "Kikyou…"

Naraku and Suikotsu both perked at the name, sigh, "Kikyou…"

Inuyasha glared at them both…"Hey, back OFF! Kikyou's MINE!"

Suikotsu and Naraku both glared back.

"What about Kagome?" Sango looked skeptically at the hanyou.

"Kagome…Kikyou…Kagome…Kikyou…can't I have both…?" this sounded much like the other mantra going on.

"Akane…Akari…Akane…Akari…Er…" Apparently Ranma told Ryouga to pick one…

"KAGOME'S MY MATE MUTT!" Kouga of the yourouzoku glared at his rival. And was then dragged off by a wind witch.

"Yeah right…wolf boy! You're mine!" Kagura dragged the poor wolf away kicking and screaming.

All the while Noriko, Miaka, and Usagi ate while talking about Hotohori, Tamahome, and Mamoru, Sango and Haruka discussed fighting techniques, Ami and Rei tried figure out where Usagi had gone, and poor Renkotsu just watched the dramatic debate/s.

"YUKI!"

"NAKAGO!"

"Akane…Akari…"

"Akane…cute or uncute?"

"Ranma…Jerk or…or…? Yeah…jerk."

"Kikyou…Kagome…"

"MY KIKYOU!"

"Lady Kikyou is not a thing! SHE IS FAR TO LOVELY TO GO TO A DEMON SUCH AS YOU NARAKU!"

"BANKOTSU!"

"JAKOTSU!"

Renkotsu:…ew…they really should get a room…

Mera: comes out of nowhere with a butcher knife DIE RENKOTSU!

Renkotsu: ARG!

-------------------------------

And so it ends…my dreams…are weird….-.-

Please review! n.n

Ja!


	20. Sogno del Lupo Linee di ripresa

Dream My Friend Had Once: 20

Welcome to chapter 20!

First off I'd like to address one of my reviewers,

Dear inu's girl,

To answer your question for your first review for chapter 14…

Mera-chan is a huge and I mean HUGE Jakotsu/Bankotsu fan, she has nothing against bald guys she just hates Renkotsu for how he betrayed the other Shichinin-tai and for what he did to Jakotsu. I too hate him for it as well, just not as much and not as out spoken as Mera-chan... n.n;

Also, with me your e-mail is safe, however if you didn't want anyone else to know your e-mail it might have been a better idea to send me a private e-mail, when you review the review is cast for everyone else to see, so if someone wanted to know the address they'd only need to look in the 'reviews' section. For future reference, if you'd like to send me anything private that other's shouldn't know then my e-mail can be found on my bio page. n.n

P.S: The e-mail address you gave me didn't work anyway, thus the reason I send my message through this chapter. I also couldn't find your pen name in the database, I tried virtually everything to contact you, and this was the only option that seemed to work. I will also have the review containing the e-mail removed just incase, that way no one will beable to see it or anything.

-Inukochan-

I really didn't have anything planned for this chapter, I basically just wanted to reply to Inu's Girl, but I don't want anyone to be disappointed so I'll come up with something anyway! n.n

Now, I'm just thinking of this off of the top of my head, so it'll probably be either really weird, really stupid, really not making sense, or all of the above.

Enjoy the madness!

---------- -------------------- ----------

Sogno del Lupo/ Linee di ripresa

---------- -------------------- ----------

Kouga ran fast, faster than ever… maybe a bit too fast he realized, as he didn't even notice he went straight through 21 trees, 5 boulders, 1 mountain, and 3 random villagers. He stopped in his tracks surveying the damage he'd caused and noticed that he knew one of the villagers he'd trampled.

He blinked and stared on at the woman who was twitching on the ground, much uncharacteristically, "Demon slayer?" he cautiously nudged Sango with his foot and she continued to twitch, then laughed as though she were on ecstasy, marijuana, and a large potion of various alcohols. He shook off the feeling of unease; this was most unlike her…from what he knew of her anyway. "Where is Kagome?" looking around the area he noticed only the taijiya was there, no mutt, no monk, and no runt.

The taijiya's only answer was, (1)"Maledizione siete caldi! Non ho saputo mai... Avete tutta l'idea quanto corto che il cuoio è, posso vedere quasi tutto da giù qui!" then she laughed more a small blushappearing across her cheeks.

Kouga visibly twitched, what language was she speaking…she was Japanese as far as he and his senses could tell, and she'd never spoken out of the language, maybe the hit hurt her more internally, did she hit her head? "Anou…slayer…you ok?" his left eye continued twitching as she spoke in a twisted tongue.

(2)" Avete così estremità piacevole! L'OH e quegli occhi... Lo sposerete? Desidero sopportare i vostri bambini allora li mangio! Allora... l'OH li mangerò... che li mangerò merce! Il ragazzo del lupo di Come'er, li ha lasciati giocare il soldato!" with that she jumped on Kouga, thoroughly freaking him out and causing him to run like a mad man with her some how managing to stay attached to his waist.

The week passed and Sango never once left Kouga, she stalked him quite nicely and always seemed to be there at the most inappropriate times. So, Kouga, the poor wolf boy, confronted her…

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!"

(3)" Posso ora molestarlo?"

"I don't understand a damn thing you're saying, speak normally woman!"

(4)"Li gradirei al ---- del -------del ----- del ----! Otteniamo l'albero del --- del ---- di Threesome del --- del ---- di Ramen del --- del ----- di inizio del ---- ed allora il canguro del ----- del ---!" insert insane laughter here.

"ARG!" Kouga glared at the woman in derision and sniffed around, hoping to catch whiff of Kagome, she might know what to do. There it was! Kagome was closer than he though! He grabbed the slayer and rushed towards the scent.

(5)"Dove noi che andiamo? In qualche luogo più riservato?" her voice oozed with suggestion and Kouga didn't like it. He didn't know what she was saying and it freaked him out!

"Thank god! Kagome!" He skidded to a halt in front of Kagome and the rest of her pack and set the taijiya down next to her. "Kagome you have to help me, you're friend is insane!" he huffed and pleaded with the miko, but to his horror the answer he got was not what he wanted…

Kagome smiled at Kouga and replied, (6)"L'OH ciao, Kouga-kun. Però desiderate essere il mio compagno? Sono più di volere è Sango-chan ed Inuyasha può unirsi dentro! Forse livelli Miroku, sto ritenendo crespo, lascili ottengono una certe corda e catena!" she gave an evil laugh as did Sango and Inuyasha, Miroku only smirked and gave a lecherous lick to his lips.

Kouga's eye twitched once more as he heard one last thing before blacking out what he heard was the worst yet, he didn't know what it meant, but in the way it was said and from whom said it, he was sure he would want to know, thus passing out would be best, Inuyasha spoke in a low husky voice towards the wolf, (7)"Sogno di questo lupo, io sogno di voi belli..."

The next morning Kouga awoke alone in the cave of his men, it had all been a dream? He sighed glad for it and looked to his friends and right and left hand men, Hakkaku and Ginta. "Good morning. Anything to report?" They didn't come to his quarters often so they must have something to say.

And oh did they say it, they both said to Kouga in similar voices, same tongue and all, (8) "Nizza per vederla è in su, bello. Vorrebbe continuare la notte scorsa?" they each gave a devilish smirk.

Kouga could only do one thing…scream and run like hell…

---------- -------------------- -------------------- -------------------- ----------

Hope you liked it! It's supposed to be Italian, I don't speak Italian though, I used "AltaVista – Babel Fish Translation" to get the Italian version.

Here are the translations!

(1): Damn you're hot! I never knew… Do you have any idea how short that pelt is, I can see almost everything from down here!

(2): You have such a nice butt! Oh and those eyes… Will you marry me? I wish to bear your children then eat them! Then…oh I'll eat you…I'll eat you good! Come'er wolf boy, let's play soldier!

(3): Can I molest you now?

(4): I'd like to ---- ----- ------ ---- you! Let's get ---- start -------- Ramen ---- --- Threesome ---- --- tree and then -------- kangaroo!

(5): Where we going? Someplace more private?

(6): Oh hello, Kouga-kun. Do you still want to be my mate? I'm more than willing if Sango-chan and Inuyasha can join in! Maybe even Miroku, I'm feeling kinky, let's get some rope and chain!

(7): I dream of this wolf, I dream of you lovely...

(8): Nice to see you're up, lovely. Would like to continue last night?

And the title "Sogno del Lupo" is supposed to mean, "I Dream of Wolf" and "Linee di ripresa" is supposed to mean "Pick-up lines"

Oh and for the second one, there's this pick up line that goes like, "(you)Hey! Wanna play war/soldier? (reply)WHAT? (you)Yea, I lay on the ground and you blow the fuck outta me!" or something like that, that's how I got the "let's play soldier" idea.

That's all for now! I hope you enjoyed it! nn Sorry for all the crudity in this chapter…v.v; I hope it doesn't offend many if any people, if it does then I sincerely apologize. I had no intention of offending anyone and I ask for forgiveness from those who I have. Thank you. n.n

Please review.

Ja!


	21. My Wife Lives in A Hole

Dream My Friend Had Once: 21

Ok…this dream was just…weird…and short, but mostly weird.

I have no clue where this came from…

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My Wife Lives in A Hole

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In this dream, I had it about two nights ago; Miroku is walking through the forest.

As Miroku journeyed on he met up with Sango, Inuyasha, and Kouga.

Sango looked to Miroku in confusion, his forehead was pealing skin and a hole was appearing, "Houshi-sama…that hole…It's…It's not another wind tunnel is it?" her eyes widen in disbelief.

Inuyasha cocked an eyebrow, "Can the kazaana even be placed on someone's head?"

Miroku sighed and responded to both, "No this is where my wife would have lived."

The yourouzoku leader looked at the monk skeptically, "You have a wife?"

"No, she died and then I ate her. However, if she had lived we would have made this hole our home and raise our fine young children until they were just tender and crisp enough to sell, we would have so many we would have cured world hunger all across Japan and Asia."

"Houshi-sama, that's not the entire world though." Sango smiled, she wished she could be Miroku's wife and have him eat her after conceiving a child for them both to consume, screw the rest of the world, she was hungry now.

"Yes, I know. My wife and I ate them…or would have if she'd lived…My poor wife, if only she were woman, oh if only she weren't a tree! My dear wife how could you let that rock deceit you so? My poor chickens will never be born now…"

The poor monk sobbed as the scene changed to a waterfall and a lion jumping off of a bridge while screaming, "Love the rocks and don't feed the animals you crazy monkeys!"

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And so it ends…twitch Clearly one of my stranger dreams…twitchtwitch

Oh well…Please leave a review! n.n

Ja!


	22. Hotness

Ok this just came to my head… don't ask, it was just weird…

Read, review, and enjoy.

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Hotness

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Kagome was home, finally. She was going to school and her class before lunch was one of her favorites, P.E. Today however she didn't like it so much, it was hot and muggy, way to warm out for sports like softball, it didn't help at all that it was her turn to be catcher and she had to wear all that heavy padding.

As the class ended she sighed and walked to lunch, what a day. First a math test now this, and top of it all she had forgotten her lunch a home!

"Kagome!"

She looked in the direction her name came from and smiled, "Momma! Thank goodness, I thought I would have to go with out lunch today!"

"Here you go dear, try and be more careful next time." Mrs. Higurashi smiled at her daughter and eldest child, "How are you, hungry I bet?"

Kagome laughed impishly, "Oh yeah, tired, hungry, and hot."

"Oh I know! You're very hot Kagome! Why, if I wasn't straight and your mother I'd so want you!" Mrs. Higurashi smiled sweetly and kissed her daughter on the forehead before leaving.

Kagome could only stand there, shocked as she watched her mother walk away, "Not what I meant…" was all that she would say for the rest of the day.

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That's all for now! Hope you liked it!

Ja ne!


	23. Kouga's Odd Dream

A Dream My Friend Had Once: 23

Welcome back!

For this next dream I have no comment, it was just weird.

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Kouga's Odd Dream

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The leader of the wolf demon tribe awoke in a slight haze and yawned. Kouga blinked a few times as he stretched before rising to greet his men and continue on in the search for Naraku.

The first one he saw was his left hand man, Ginta. "Oi, Ginta!" Kouga gave a casual wave to his friend who in turn waved back.

"Hey Kouga!" Ginta ran up to his leader cheerfully, "sleep well?" lately Kouga hadn't been sleeping as well as he should have been, probably due to stress with Naraku, leading the clan, and losing so many of them at once.

"Kind of, I had the oddest dream…" Kouga's right eye twitched at the memory and he shuddered.

The gray haired wolf blinked at his leader's expression, "Oh come on, it couldn't have been that bad."

"Have you ever had a dream where you rip out Elmo's brains and deep fry them with Kermit's legs in a batch of cookie dough then force feed it to the Cookie Monster by shoving down his throat?"

Ginta's left eye twitched in sync with his left eye brow as he answered, "Erm…no…"

"Then I've made my point…"

Thus the two wolf demons are left to twitch at the memory of Kouga's odd dream.

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Well that's that!

Short but weird, thus it evens out.

Please review! n.n

Ja!


	24. Nose Bleeds and Evil Laughs

A Dream My Friend Had Once: 24

Welcome to chapter 24, it's kinda short, but that's nothing new!

Enjoy and review.

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Nose Bleeds and Evil Laughs

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Kouga and Inuyasha have gotten into a fight once again.

"Kouga, Inuyasha, stop it!" Kagome was angry; they always did this! "Inuyasha, sit!"

Kouga's cocky laugh could be heard as Inuyasha fell to the ground.

"Why can't you two just get along?"

"Keh, as if Kagome! I'm going to kill this mangy wolf!"

"Yeah right, mutt face! You're no match for me!"

It is at this point that Sango comes out of nowhere, "Well none of you are any match for me! Bwahahahahahaha!" she laughed evilly.

Sweat drop

"Anou…Sango-chan are you ok?" Kagome looked at her friend skeptically.

Sango was now jumping up and down on Inuyasha while smacking Kouga with her Hiraikotsu.

Kouga growled enraged by the slayers actions, "That's it slayer, you're going down!" he lashed out at Sango striking her in her jaw.

The slayer flew back several yards only to come bouncing back. "Oh yeah? Well take this!" Sango then ripped off her top and screamed, "Cleavage fu!" as she crashed into Kouga giving a face full of erm…flesh. After she was done with Kouga she charged Inuyasha, "I can beat you both, you're no match for my cleavage!"

At this Kouga and Inuyasha both passed out from extensive blood loss due to the nosebleeds.

All the while Miroku stood in the background sobbing, 'Why can't she act insane like that with me?"

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That's all for now, please review!

Ja!


	25. WTF?

A Dream My Friend Had Once 25:

Welcome to A Dream My Friend Had Once!

This is just a bunch of random Inuyasha related thought's that have popped up in my mind recently, why? Who knows!

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WTF?

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Random Thought Number One:

Kohaku plays as Kevin in "Home Alone".

Kohaku smacks face on both sides and screams, "Ahhhhh!"

Random Thought Number Two:

Sesshoumaru walks on stage wearing a pretty pink dress, "Does this make me look fat?"

Random Thought Number Three:

Naraku eats Kanna…that could be wrong on several levels…I have a sick mind…

Random Thought Number Four:

Kagome runs up to the top of a random mountain that happens to be Kouga's, "I LOVE PANCAKES!"

Kouga runs up to Kagome, "I LOVE YOU!"

Naraku appears out of nowhere, "I LOVE EVERYTHING!" twirls in a circles and throws flowers.

Random Thought Number Five:

Inuyasha comes on stage wearing a Barney the Dinosaur costume, "…. Shut up…."

Random Thought Number Six:

Sesshoumaru comes on stage wearing a blue mini skirt that rivaled Sailor Moon's skirt's shortness… "How about this, does this make me look fat?"

Random person, "YES!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes tear up and he runs off crying and spends the rest of his night drowning his sorrows by binging on triple chocolate Ice cream.

Random Thought Number Seven:

Renkotsu is spinning and dancing to a tune called, "Hit Me Baby One More Time"…oh god he's singing too! SHUT UP! SHUT UP SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP! Oh, oh thank god! Here comes Mera-chan! Mera-chan axes the Brittany Spares CD to little bite sized bites and then screams, "RENKOTSU IS THE SPAWN OF ALL EVIL THAT IS AMERICAN POP AND SATAN!" while brutally torturing Renkotsu, laughing evilly, and pouting after the bald second in command dies…poor Mera-chan lost her toy…

Random person:twitch: "WTF?" that "spawn of pop and Satan" thing didn't make sense!

Random Thought Number Eight:

Sesshoumaru runs out in a Bunny Girl outfit and kills the Random person, "How dare you call me fat! I'M PRETTY AND THIN, I'M PRETTY AND THIN!" apparently he got over his depression….

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That's all for now!

Hope you liked it! n.n

Please leave review!

Ja!


	26. Painkillers Can Make You Loopy

A Dream My Friend Had Once: 26

Welcome back!

These two are not dreams, but actual happenings! I REPEAT this DID actually happen!

Ok, these next two happened to dear Mera-chan whilst she was shot up on painkillers, I think it was called Vicaden…n.n; Anyway, to make it fit into the Inuyasha category, Kagome will play as Mera-chan and Kouga will play as our good friend Suli-chan!

The third one was originally Suli being weird while she was over at Mera-chan's house. Then again when isn't Suli weird? These parts will be played by Kagome and Sango. Sango will be Suli and Kagome, once again, will be Mera. Kirara will play as Mera's cat Rain in #3 part 2.

Enjoy and review!

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Painkillers Can Make You Loopy…

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#1: Do lesbians make good plants?

It was a nice bright day out and everything was well! Aside from the constant spinning…

Kagome had gotten back from her own time where her doctors had recently put her on some strong painkillers. Inuyasha, the prick, wouldn't let her stay home. SO, here she was wandering around the forest, seemingly to have lost her companions. Only moments later did she stumble across the one and only Kouga of the Wolf Demon Tribe, who in his concern for Kagome took her back to his cave so she could rest.

While Kagome lay on a bed of furs Kouga went to work on building a fire (Note: In actuality, Suli-chan was on the computer…) His attention was soon brought back to the hallucinating, delusion stuck, painkiller high girl when she shot up from her slumber into a sitting position and screamed, "KOUGA! Don't plant the lesbian!"

To this wonderful statement Kouga could only respond, "Bwah…?" as dear Kagome fell backwards sleeping once more.

(When Suli had questioned Mera about this statement Mera's only reply was "I don't know what it meant, but it seemed like vital information for you to know at the time." Indeed, Mera, indeed…)

#2: Enter the new age! Spider Man is indeed a woman!

Kagome finally convinced Inuyasha to let her come home after explaining her meeting with Kouga and also 'sit'ing him a few thousand times.

Now she was lying in her room, on her bed. She was still on painkillers and seemed to be convinced that she was Spider Man…o.O

Kagome stared blankly at the ceiling as she spoke to no one, being she was the only one present in the room, "If I could get up, I could so climb that wall."

#3: Alien Probing

Kagome was no longer loopy, but was a bit cold as the winter season was starting in the feudal era. She and Sango were snuggled up close to conserve warmth. All was well until Sango's foot came in contact with Kagome's butt. Soon after she stated, "Haha, I have probed you, I shall send this sample to our alien leader…"

Kagome raised her eyebrow and looked to her friend, "What?"

"Nothing! You heard nothing!"

#3Part2: More Probing…

A while later Kirara for one reason or the other jumped at Kagome's butt and latched to her before fleeing. At this Sango said in a hushed voice, "Mission complete, returning to the mother ship in four hours…"

Kagome once more looked at Sango with a perplexed face, "What'd you say?"

"It's nothing you need to know!" she then whispered, "Come in mother ship, we may be prolonged."

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That's all for now! Hope you liked it!

Please review for me! Thank you. n.n

Ja ne!


	27. What The Hell is A Poukeimonu?

Hello and welcome to "A Dream My Friend Had Once"!

This chapter is just a random thought that crossed my mind when I was flipping channels, one show I flipped past happened to be pokemon, and thus the thought was born! n.n

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What the Hell is A Pou-kei-monu?

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Misty, Ash, Brock (Sp?), and Pikachu were walking through some random forest when Tokapi (Sp?) ran out of sight. The traveling companions worried ran after the little egg like…thing? They knew they'd find it, what they didn't know is what they were about to find along with it (Do pokemon have genders? Is Tokapi a girl, a guy, or possibly a hermaphrodite? I'll just continue to call it an it…).

Ash and co. ran deeper into the forest and found little Tokapi in the clutches of…dun dun DUUUUNN, something that they didn't know what it was so they assumed it was a new pokemon!

Kouga held the little egg…thing…and leered at it (leerleerleerleerleerleerLEERLEERLEERleerleerleerleer………LEEEEEEEERRRR) "What the hell is this, food?"

Inuyasha joined in at looking at it as it cried out, "Pi, toto, katokapiiiii."

Sesshoumaru huffed, "Cease this nonsense, Inuyasha! Either fight or go back to your human! I will just defeat Naraku myself!"

Inuyasha glared at his brother, "Like hell you will! I'll be the one to take Naraku's head!"

Naraku looked to the egg…thing… he had only recently turned into his newest form (Ya know the one with the spikes and the red eye coming out of the chest… that eye is just sooo…HOT!) "That-that thing is-is…so…CUUUUTE!" and thus the horrible, tedious, EVIL Naraku snatched poor Tokapi from Kouga's grasp and glomped it, making baby noises to it and even going to the lengths of rubbing his cheeks on it…the vile, evil little bastard!

Misty could only scream, "ASH! Do something that pokemon is hurting Tokapi!"

Naraku looked at the woman skeptically, "What the hell is a pou-kei-monu?"

However, he never got his answer… "Pikachu, thunder bolt attack!" Ash was going to catch these new pokemon if it killed him!

"Piiiikaaachuuuuuuu!"

The lightning hit Naraku who in sync dropped little Tokapi and then turned to Sesshoumaru crying, "Sesshoumaru! Kill that little ingrate, he bruised my beautiful face! How can Akago look up to me if I look like this! Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! You'll hate me! Who wants a lover/mate with a shocked face? Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

Kouga's eyes widen slightly, "You're with Naraku? I thought you were trying to kill him?"

"You idiot Naraku you blew our cover!" Sesshoumaru scowled at the wailing Naraku who in turn apologized and gave the dog demon lord of the west a great big slobbery kiss!

"Oh…ewww…I did not need to hear nor see that…" Inuyasha's face scrunched in disgust.

"What? Quit acting so high and mighty, you and the wolf are together! Aren't you rivals? Rivals my ass! The only thing you fight for is top!" Sesshoumaru stuck out his tongue to his younger brother.

This wasn't going anywhere, Ash just had to catch one, he had to! He would go insane if he didn't! Gotta catch 'em all, gottacatch'emall, gottacatch'emall, GOTTACATCH'EMALL! WUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA! "Pikachu! QUICK ATTACK!"

Pikachu slammed himself into Kouga, going for the kill!

"Ah! DAMNIT YOU LITTLE RODENT, THAT WAS MY LEG!" Kouga then proceeded to grab the mouse like thing by its tail and rip off its head…lovely dear…just lovely.

Ash gasped, "They killed Pikachu!"

Brock's eyes narrowed, "You bastards!"

Then Inuyasha knocked the humans out, tossed them into the closest village and left with Kouga.

Later, Sesshoumaru and Naraku made up and decided to make a little brother or sister for Akago so he wouldn't feel bad about being the youngest later.

Around that same time Kouga and Inuyasha were eating fried Pikachu and roasted Tokapi, toped off with a long night of hot, steamy, MAN poker…then some loving with occasional fights over 'who got to be top tonight'.

And every one lived happily ever after…Tralalalala!

End!

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter; please leave me a review letting me know what you though! n.n

Thank you!

Ja!


	28. Sexiness

More dreams! Yay!

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**Sexiness**

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Ok, last night I had two sexy dreams.

_Sexy Dream Number One:_

Kouga was standing in front of many characters from many Animes all were paired up, some yaoi, some yuri, some normal. Some couples made no sense. Example, Miroku was paired with Rikuo from Legal Drug. O.o Scary…

Anyway, in front of everyone there Kouga was explaining sex…how it works, the thought process, and everything that plays into it, even different positions and the way to get the best results. However, he was explaining most of this from a wolf demon's perspective. Then everyone had a huge orgy together and switched partners every so often. O.x

_Sexy Dream Number Two:_

Inuyasha was hungry, very hungry, so he got a squirrel. The squirrel begged to be let free, it had a wife and a kid on the way. Inuyasha still would not let it free. And thus the squirrel, determined to see it's child born and screw his wife again stood up on it's hind legs, facing his captor whilst shouting, "REVOLUTION!" and launched itself onto the hanyou's face biting Inuyasha's nose before running away leaving the poor hanyou to bleed and twitch.

….Now that's sexy….n.n

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Reviewers loved.

Ja!

Inukochan


	29. Byebye High School

Welcome to a dream my friend had once chapter 29!

A close friend of mine wanted me make this for her. However, this is not one that includes any animes, so I changed the names so it was Inuyasha characters, it's stupidly funny so I felt like sharing. This is a skit my dear friend Ami-chan wanted us to do in honor of leaving the high school. This was like last year by the way, anyway, some of this really did happen and it was meant to portray how we usual are, so by using the Inuyasha characters it'll be probably very OOC, but sometimes it's funnier that way! n.n

Note all characters will be going to Kagome's high school, that way it makes more sense and I don't have to change much…

Characters:

Sam- me, the writer

Inuyasha

Kouga

Sango -- she'll be most OOC, she's taking the place of my friend Ami (She's the close friend. I'm making Sango her because she hates Sango and I think it would be humorous for Sango to have a butt fetish)

Kagome

Miroku

Sesshoumaru

Kagura

Ayame

Naraku

Kanna

Kikyou

Kohaku

Shippou --- Apparently he's a very short high-schooler…

Rin --- Also a short high-schooler

Bankotsu

Jakotsu

Ginta

Hakkaku

Hakudoshi

Jaken

I'm lazy, so if I missed anyone else they will be the random people in the background…

Random People in Background are RPB

Random people walking through hallway are RPWH

_**Warning: Is in Script format!**_

And so with out further adieu, please read, review, and enjoy! n.n

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**Farwell to Thee Our Beloved High School; We Welcome Thy New Life**

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Sango: YEEEEEEEEEEE! MOVING UP, WE'RE MOVING UP!

Kikyou: Ngeh…

Miroku: Owww... Quit kicking me, Sam…

Sam: No you forgot my book…

Miroku: I said I'd bring it tomorrow.

Sam: To bad…

Sango: Is anyone listening to me?

Kagura/Kouga/Naraku: No…

Sango: SAM! No one's listening to me!

Sam: Aw… poor San-chan…hugs It'll be ok…_-gropes chest-_

Sango: Ok…Heehee _-Gropes butt-_

Sam: …Hey!

Sango: I'm sorry, please don't hurt me!

RPB: ………

RPWH: _-Giving us all weird looks-_

Sam: _-is somehow now sitting on Kouga-_

Kouga: Can't breathe…

Shippou and Inuyasha: _-talking about video games-_

Sesshoumaru: _-Looking at everyone as though they are morons-_

Rin:_ -Walks into area- _Morning everyone!

Kohaku/Kanna: Hey Rin. _-Wave-_

Rin: _-Tries to give Jaken a hug-_

Jaken: Noooo….

Sango: Everyone listen up!

Sango: _-being ignored-_

Sam: If you don't listen we'll grope you!

All:_ -visibly twitch-_

RPWH: _-give more weird looks-_

Sam: Good…See San-chan, you just need to be louder and make threats.

Sango: Ok then… _-embarrassed-_

Sam: Ok everyone! We're going to do a skit in honor of leaving the high school! If you don't participate in some way I, Sango, or some random pedophile we get off the street will molest you. Thank you! I have made the script feel free to ignore it and go by your own lines, that's what'll make it interesting in the long run! -Smile-

Bankotsu:…what's the point of the script then?

Sam: I don't know…I guess I just made it to waste my own time?

Ginta: Oh well then.

Kagome: _-walks in-_

Sam: Kagome! You're late!

Kagome: …I couldn't help it…

Sam: Ok, you're going to be in a skit, yes?

Kagome: Do I have a choice?

Sango: Sure. Play along or get groped!

Kagome: In other words, no I don't…

Jakotsu: Exactly.

Ayame: I don't want too! The camera hates me! _-Trying to hide from the camera-_

Sango: _-filming-_ Aw… come on Ayame!

**Mean while…**

Miroku: _-looking over his lines-_ …I am not saying that…

Inuyasha: _-looks over his shoulder and laughs at the lines-_

Kagome: _-joins in with the laughing-_ It's so you!

Shippou: Why what's it say?

Hakudoshi: _-Snatches the script from Miroku-_ It says: And thenMiroku stated, "I am a flying chicken with a red caboose. Call me Bob and you shall die, I am Shego of the scum/male-hating amazons. Hear me…" moan? …No comment on that one…

**_In the opposite corner…_**

Hakkaku: You can't touch my wife like that.

Ginta: _-Holds up a sign saying "The Wife"-_

RPB: _-pout-_

Sango: You can't just read the lines! I need passion people! Gimmie some drama, some emotion, some sex scenes! …Did I just say that last part out loud? Oops… Teehee.

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Sango: _-reading Script-_ SAM! Don't put that in or the groping part; my mom might be watching this!

Sam: That's ok! She already knows we're weird. _-Smile smile-_

Sango: But she doesn't know that I'm constantly being groped and have a butt fetish!

Sam: _-writing-_ She does now!

Sango: _-Groan- -Sigh-_

Jakotsu: _-sings in monotone voice-_ I lie in my bed. My tears run red. My soul has now fled. Now I'm dead; in my bed. _-Laughs-_ I love that!

Shippou/Inuyasha/Miroku: Dead, dead, dead

Kagome/Bankotsu/Jaken: Death, death, death

Naraku: ………Aiiiieeeee! _-Runs away-_

Kohaku: You people are so odd! _-Chuckles and smiles-_

Sam: I love you!

Kohaku: Aw…thanks! I like you too.

Kouga: Like, never love.

Kagura:…悲しい...(Japanese word for sad or tear; pronunciation- Ka-na-she)

Kikyou:…

Ayame: Wait, Sango is San-chan, what's Kagome's nickname?

Kagome: I don't want to say…

Sango: Come on Kagome!

Rin: Yeah!

Kagome: _-mumble mumble-_

Shippou: What?

Kagome: Lace bound princess…

Sango/Rin/Shippou:…Er…

Ginta: Why?

Kagome: I don't want to say…

Sam: Because her bra is lacey! n.n

All: …

Kagome:_ -embarrassed-_

RPWH: _-give more strange looks and whisper to each other-_

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And that's were it ends!

Leave a review and I'll love you forever!

Ja!


	30. Spiderman vs Batman

Wow…Chapter 30…That's quite a few chapters isn't it?

Randomness in this chapter, be afraid…be very afraid.

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…Spider man vs. Batman…

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Randomness number one:

Naraku was being good today. No evil plots or killing for this gorgeous, lively, father of…somewhere between three and ten who loves to bake cupcakes. Nope, just quiet alone time, with occasional playtime and performing for the kids.

Playtime consisted of baking, sewing up Kagura's clothes; she can be so careless, and of course playing with his Spider man action figure…Spider man so kicks Batman's ass…

Then, performance time consisted of Naraku cosplaying Spider man. "I can shoot a web! Pew, pew, pew!" Naraku made Spider man's shooting of the web pose.

Randomness number two:

Sesshoumaru and Naraku's relationship has been a bit rocky lately, so just to piss Naraku off Sesshoumaru makes fun of Spider man.

"Kicks Batman's ass" my ass! At least Batman can fight and travel anywhere, he has jets and cars. Spider man only has his web! I'd like to see him swing around in a cornfield… What kind of a power is that? Super man's strength and leaser eyes are WAY better! Spider man doesn't deserve Mary Jane!" Sesshoumaru scowled and scoffed as Naraku sniffled.

Naraku huffed, trying to hold back the tears as he looked at his Mary Jane and Spider man action figures, "What do you know?" he sobbed out, "At least Spider man has powers! Unlike that spoiled Batman! With out his toys, Batman is nothing!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed, "You take that back…"

"I won't take it back! You started this you whore, now finish it!"

"How dare you!"

CATFIGHT! n.n

Naraku and Sesshoumaru scratched and bit at each other while random sadistic fan-girls taped the blood splatter as well as the 'make-up' sex that came after it.

Randomness number three:

Jaken walks out onto a stage and says to the audience/readers, "And kids, always remember your three R's and three P's. The R's are respect, responsibility, and rape; P's, peace, prosperity, and pedophilia. Pedophiles, kidnapping and rapping children for over 5,000 years; you can count on us! Just listen to what are satisfied customers have to say!"

The screen changes over to Shippou and Rin, both wearing next to nothing, they quietly spoke to the camera, "Help…help us…" Tears came to their eyes just before the screen switched back to Jaken.

"And there you have it, you're children will love the pedophile daycare center just as much as we love them! Call us now." Jaken gave a thumbs up and a toothy grin as the commercial ended.

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I'm so sick and twisted, I love my mind; it entertains me…

Please note that some of the Spider man joke/s were taken from a comedian that I have forgotten the name of.

Reviews equals Love equals Happiness equals No Homicidal Thoughts


	31. ET Phone Home

…Forgive me…but I am afraid that I can find no words to justify what you are about to read…

…--forcefully oppressing a smile as well as the urge to laugh-- how do I come up these ideas? … I creep myself out sometimes…-.-;

Warning…just warning… I warn you! --cringes and runs away screaming--

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E.T. Phone Home

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It was your every day…day, and our wolf prince was roaming the land in search of his nemesis, Naraku. That is, until he saw a woman wearing a green skirt with dark hair, just like his woman's. _'Lovely Kagome and with no mutt in sight'_ he thought to himself with a sly smirk.

He came to a stop behind his love and pulled her close to him, "My dear Kagome how I've missed you." he stated as she turned her head towards him, allowing him to look deep into her… "WTF?" Kouga couldn't help but scream at the sight before him.

It was a creature of some sort, it blinked oddly and said "…E.T. phone home…" the creature poked Kouga's finger with it's own and the wolf demon cringed in disgust, dropping the creature with no remorse.

He watched as the wig and clothes fell from the creature's body revealing that it had no form of an anatomically correct 'happy place'. Not that it mattered…but how did it have pups? _'No! Stop thinking about it! Arg!' _So as a solution to the problem our dear wolf simply…lopped the creature's head off.

"Heh…" Kouga huffed in satisfaction as he stalked away from the now bloody creature with no apparent gender.

Only to be stopped by a three fingered hand grabbing his ankle, "E.T….phone home…" The wolf gasped in surprise and in turn cut the hand to pieces. To his surprise the chunks of what remained of the creature started floating and clinging to him shouting, "E.T. phone home!"

Kouga screamed in horror, disgust, and confusion as the green bloody chunks pulled him down.

The wolf awoke in a sweat, what a dream it had been… "Ko-Kowaii…"(Kowaii- means scary)

"Oi, Kouga. You gonna be okay?" Ginta looked to his leader with worry etched on his face.

"Yeah…That was one weird dream…" he sighed relieved it was over.

Hakkaku snickered, "it must have been…look at that!" Upon seeing what the white haired wolf spoke of Ginta too joined in the laughter, noticing the confused look on Kouga's face he continued to chuckle and he pointed at his leaders…ahem…groin, which suggested that he didn't oppose the dream as much as he thought he did.

In turn the great leader of the yourouzoku could only scream in sheer horror…and smack his companions over the head for laughing at his misery.

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--Laughs-- I am sooo evil and twisted sometimes! >

Please leave a review! n.n


	32. Crack Pairings

Welcome to a Dream My Friend Had Once chapter 32!

This is just a simple list I randomly came up with. I'm no longer allowed to get bored or to think while trying to sleep, I say this because when I'm bored/thinking while trying to sleep nothing good comes of it. If fact, anything that does come of it makes people say "What the fuck?" (Or if you hate cussing then "What the Hell?" or if you're a major Christian and dislike cussing or the word hell in that contest then perhaps you would say "What the crap?" in any case the meaning is the same…)

Proceed with caution; don't say I didn't warn you.

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"Crack Pairings"

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This is a listing of Inuyasha pairings that I have seen or have at the very least heard of that would be considered WAY out of the normal.

One:

Kagura/Hakkaku:

I actually came up with this pairing and it was then that I heard the phrase "Crack pairing".

Inukochan: Mera-chan! I paired Kagura with Hakkaku! n.n

Mera: o.O Arg! No! Bad! Crack pairing, crack pairing! 

Two:

Ayame/Bankotsu:

I saw this in a fanfic once; can't remember the name of it… but lord! How did this happen? O.0 Odd to say the least.

Three:

Rin/Kanna:

I've seen this in fanarts and fanfiction alike and I still have yet to understand it.

Four:

Sango/Sesshoumaru:

I've seen a few of these and it is possible. (One of the fics I read staring the couple was MARVELOUSLY done! It was wonderful.) But still, it seems so highly unlikely I chose to put it in here.

Five:

Kouga/Miroku:

I love this pairing, I really do! (Then again I love almost anything with Kouga in it) Yet, lets be rational here, as cute as it may or may not sound it just wouldn't happen. (Envisions Miroku grabbing Kouga's butt and then Kouga lopping his head off.

**-sweat drop-**

Six:

Kohaku/Souta:

**-Scratches head in wonderment-** Erm…how? I mean, out side of an alternate universe fanfic…how? **–twitches-**

Seven:

Kouga/Sango:

I love this pairing too! But come on, again cute and plausible but highly unlikely.

_**(By the way feel free to disagree with me on these, some of them I even hesitated to put up. Also feel free to suggest a "crack pairing" you've see/heard of before…"crack pairing"…that sounds kind of mean…oh well, I don't have the energy to come up with a new one…) **_

Eight:

Inuyasha/Souta:

I could not believe it when I saw this one…It made me cringe…Some of the things people come up with just make Inuyasha seem like such a pedophile.

Nine:

Inuyasha/Shippou:

Again…pe-do-phi-le…Even in ones where they make Shippou an adult, just the sound of it! **–shudders- **I don't care what anyone else says, to me Shippou-chan will always belong with Souten. (They're sooo cute together!)

Ten:

Sesshoumaru/Shippou:

See number nine.

Eleven:

Kouga/Shippou:

See number ten and/or number nine.

Twelve:

Sesshoumaru/Houjo:

…Gimmie a minute…-deep breath- AHHHHRRRRGGGGGWHHHHHAHHHHH! WHY! HOW! I can't believe I even read that one…

**-twitchspasmgurgletwitchshudder-**

Thirteen:

Naraku/Ayame:

…They never even met…Plausible, yet HIGHLY unlikely.

Fourteen:

Sesshoumaru/Jaken:

This one is possible, but…ewe…why would someone write/read that? I found an NC-17 of this pairing and I just…urg…I twitched…

And finally…

Fifteen:

Inuyasha/Mrs.Higurashi:

I found one of these…I actually found one of these! How bizarre can you get? It's almost as bad as the Sesshoumaru/Houjo.

Wait, never mind, I thought of another one!

Sixteen:

Naraku/Mrs.Higurashi:

The one I found of this wasn't in high detail, but it was saying that Kagome was actually possibly Naraku's child which is why she never knew her father. This suggestion reminds me of Starwars…

Naraku: Wait…I must tell you. –**weird breathing noises-** Kagome**…-weird breathing noises-** I am…your father…

Kagome: What? NOOOOOOOO! **–is missing a hand-**

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**And that's that for this chapter!**

**Please, if you have any other pairings you think should be added or if you'd like to disagree with one of the pairings put up then just contact me through e-mail (can be found on my bio page) or through a review.**

**Thank you for reading I look forward to reading your reviews! n.n**


	33. Look I'm MegaMan!

Welcome to a Dream My Friend Had Once chapter 33!

It's been awhile since I came up with anything! O.o

I'll put in a couple things to make up for it.

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**Look I'm Mega-man!**

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This one is something that happened at work…I was hyper and bored. Kagome will play as myself and Sango will play as my co-worker.

Kagome ran out of the bathroom a smile plastered onto her face as she jumped out in front of her friend, "Look, Sango! I'm Mega-man!"

Sango looked to her friend, raising an eyebrow as she took in the appearance. Kagome was holding one arm out in a mega-man pose, and said arm had four large toilet paper rolls stacked up past her wrist giving a similar look to Mega-man's arm. As Sango looked at the arm and her friend's overly hyper attitude she could only manage to respond, "Riiiight…sure you are, Kagome."

To this Kagome beamed back a smile and bounced back into the bathroom to put the toilet paper rolls back where they belonged.

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This was a conversation I had at work…Sango will play as myself and Sesshoumaru will play as the co-worker.

Sango sighed; it just wasn't her day today. Miroku was just…Miroku, he hit on her and he groped her, but she couldn't talk to Kagome about it and what she was feeling because Kagome was somewhere with Inuyasha; she couldn't talk about it with Shippou either, he was just a kid. She sighed again and continued walking through the dense forest with no real destination in mind.

She stopped as a figure came into view, it was Sesshoumaru. What he was doing in the area, she hadn't a clue. However, she knew he would not be hostel towards her; he was usually not hostel without any reason, so she continued her walk and stopped next to him.

"You don't have to talk back…but I just really need to talk to someone right now, even if they won't respond." She sighed again as the Inu tai-youkai gave no show of retort. "I know Miroku likes me…it'd be impossible not to tell, but I just don't feel the same. I feel as though it would be possible, maybe if we spent more time together we could have a relationship, but as of now he is just my friend. I don't want to hurt him by rejecting him and I really just don't know what to do anymore." She felt better now that she had said it all out loud even if it wasn't to a real friend and even if she didn't get a response.

To her surprise she did get a response, just not one she was expecting especially from someone like Sesshoumaru, "Hit it and quit it". Hearing this Sango could only twitch as she watched the demon lord walk back to where ever it is he dwelled.

(For those of you who may not know, "Hit it" refers to sex and "quit it" refers to dumping...in short to say "Hit it and quit it" is like saying "Have sex with them and then dump them")

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This one is a dream Suli had, it was in the review section and I never got around to posting it. Thank you for this Suli-chan.

_**Note:** I just copy and pasted it from Suli's review, I had nothing to do with the actual writing or idea. All I have done is correct spelling errors and split it so that it is easier to read. Thank you._

Miroku, Sess, and Kouga go to Paris, but the tower is gone.

They make it to their hotel room to find that Kagome and Sango had followed them. The guys share a room and the girls have their own.

The guys all get drunk and suddenly, Miroku turns into the bottom half of the tower, Kouga gets scared and turns into the top half. Together they make Godzilla noises and eat Paris people and constantly spit up hairballs.

Finally, they go back to the room to eat Sess, who starts telling stupid jokes, some how turning the guys back into themselves. Kouga lands on top of Sess, and then they start to make out. Miroku plays the Canadian anthem with his tuba, whilst eating jelly donuts. Next door, two drunken girls are hanging out their windows calling out to hot guys.

Half an hour later, they fall out and die.

The End.

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That's all for this chapter, I hope you enjoyed it!

Please leave a review, they are my life blood and I can't live without them…please help keep me alive for at least another two years.


	34. A Random Thought

Welcome back to "A Dream My Friend Had Once"!

This chapter is odd…not like the others weren't…n.n; But in any case the way it came about is probably more odd.

I thought of this while I was taking a shower and remembering a dream I had where I was washing my hair and trying to figure out the difference between shampoo and conditioner…despite the fact that I already know those differences as most people probably do. Anyway, enjoy.

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A Random Thought

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Kagome sighed; she was finally back in her own world. And she horribly needed a bath! She got up from her seat after sniffing herself and walked to the restroom, thankful for the plumbing the other world lacked.

She disrobed and entered the shower after turning it on and making sure the temperature was just right, she sighed contently as she began to scrub away the dirt and grime her travels had left behind.

However, she was completely oblivious to the horror that was about to come. She turned her head slightly at the slight noise of footsteps and saw a shadowed figure through the shower curtain

…insert 'slasher' music here…

She gasped and turned to face the figure unsure of what was about to become of her just then a snake came out of the drainage in the bath tub and bit off Kagome's head.

Mere seconds later Houjo through the curtain back and held an axe over his head, "Alright, Kagome, tell me why you keep skipping out on our dates! Or ELSE!" he blinked as he looked to the nude and headless girl the crumpled to the floor of the tub the snake seemingly vanished.

He gulped and quickly back trailed out of the restroom and house. He repeated phrases to himself such as "I didn't do it…" and "It wasn't me."

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That's it for this chapter, please review for me! n.n


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